One of Kendall's teachers, I think third grade, had the saying - Fun isn't fun unless its fun for everyone. It was a good message for third graders and a good message for all that has become a saying in our house for nearly 20 years! I have been reflecting on the difference of two recent experiences.
I have some dear friends that are so kind and caring and also when I am laughing about something silly that I have done they laugh with me. I have one in particular that I will text her at times to let her know what I did that just was funny. For instance the other day, Steve dropped me off at the office right by the door. I ran into the office with some items and then came right back out for us to leave. In the meantime, he had turned around the car (actually being helpful easier access). However, I didn't realize that and so went over to the driver's side to get in - which was the passenger side when I got dropped off. He asked me if I'd like to drive :). Steve and I laughed and I later shared the funny experience with a friend. She was laughing with me. It was pretty funny. Daily there are little silly things that happen to each of us - blind or not.
Another experience that was such a contrast. A man came in to be interviewed. He saw Cricket and I explained that she was a guide dog because I was blind. He said in a tone that felt ouch -- oh, does that mean I get to tell blind jokes? It was interesting to feel how unfunny/put down that felt.
I thought of Kendall's teacher teaching her class that fun isn't fun unless its fun for everyone. She was trying to teach them that when we laugh with someone it is fun ... when we laugh at someone or a group it isn't funny at all.
Now, don't get me wrong. Humor and playfulness are one of the character strengths that we will be talking about in our seminar tomorrow. "You like to laugh and tease. Bringing smiles to other people is important to you. You try to see the light side of all situations." I think we just need to make sure that fun is fun when its fun for everyone :). Thanks Mrs. E for teaching your third graders an important life message.
The journeys of Becky, blind from retinitis pigmentosa, and her beauitiful guide dogs.
8 comments:
In response to the "blind jokes" comment from the interviewer, you already know you're not going to get the job. You may as well give the interviewer a few sleepless nights. So why not reply with...
"Oh, ABSOLUTELY! I know 'em ALL! Hey, did you hear the one that goes 'a blind guy walked into the local Department of Justice office... stop me if you've heard it.'"
What a great quote! I cannot wait to use it for my girls!
Yes I love those jokes shared with my husband too. Our men are sweethearts. But unfortunately I too come across those who don't make it fun for everyone. Some boys were laughing at me once and I managed to find a quick response that turned it around to them laughing with me (and I think they thought I was pretty cool after that). Not always do those witty responses come to me in time and sometimes it's just plain too upsetting to respond. Always love your thoughts my friend. x
Loved the quote. why on earth do people say such thoughtless and unkind things? I haven't figured it out but too many do. I well remember interviewing a potential secretary and when we stood up to shake hands she said "My heavens how short are you" ( I am only 5') Well, I said Tall enough to tell you that you didn't get the job. I have always felt good about the come back to her thoughtlessness. Mom
Kendall's teacher was so wise. Thanks for sharing.
Perfect!!
Laughing WITH someone makes all the difference.
I hate that sometimes about comedians, who "think" their jokes are funny, when to ME, it seems degrading and insulting.
Thanks for your comments. We are in Atlanta at an amazing conference! Look forward to sharing :).
What a true lesson.
Just dropping in to say "Hi". Have a good time in Atlanta.
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